Did you ever have one of those days where everything went wrong?  From beginning to end, absolutely nothing went your way?  Those days seem to occur all to frequently.

Well yesterday was the exact OPPOSITE of that.

But let me start at what SHOULD have been the beginning of Gabe’s operation ordeal, last Friday.

(NOTE:  For those who missed the original posts, catch up by first reading Gabriel’s Heart, and then Put On Hold.)

Worst. Friday. Ever.

Historically Fridays rock.  The weekend is approaching and even though I do work some Saturdays there is a definite sense of calm and serenity that envelops me (well, as serene as I get anyway) as I know a few days of doing not much (plus my cheat day) is right around the corner.

Gabe’s operation was scheduled for Friday, December 4th. It had been that way for 4 or 5 weeks. Our lives revolved around December 4th.

Always in my head was…

December 4th
December 4th
December 4th

Our mental calendars were set to Pre-D4 and Post-D4.

Everything in our lives was a function of that date. Then the day came, and everything went to crap.

We had planned on leaving our house around 8:45am to check in at UCLA at 10am.  A good plan  so far.  I had time for a quick workout and I knew that would allow me time to clear my head and focus on the day. I headed to the gym at 7am and planned on being out of there no later than 8am.

At about 7:30am I got a call from my mother who was at our house getting prepped to leave for UCLA. She informed me Gabe had snuck some chocolate and my wife, Denyse, was losing it.  (Gabe was supposed to go without food or liquid since midnight.) With that news I figured I should head home.

I took a drink of water, wiped myself down and drove the 30 second commute to my house. In that short time Denyse was informed by the anesthesiologist that 1 ounce of chocolate was enough to force us to reschedule Gabe’s operation. That was it, operation cancelled and re-scheduled for Monday.

Suddenly and instantly December 4th was just another day.

I took a few minutes to figure out what was happening.  I was still in relative shock. Then it occurred to Denyse thought “I guess we send him to school.” We shoveled some cereal down his throat, packed him a lunch and sent him off to school.

Gabe was gone, most of the house was crying and I was mostly angry.  At everyone and everything.  It wasn’t long before the anger faded and I turned into an emotional muscle lump. I too, checked out for a few minutes.

Eventually I pulled my sh^t together and then tried to figure out what was next.  We had invested so much mental energy into that day being THE day, I really did not know what to do with myself.

I mean really, WTF do we do know?  I was at a loss.

Out of the Darkness…

I sent out an email blast notifying everyone about our postponement.  The very first email I got back was from our friend Jen Levinson, the custodian of the amazing Jen’s List.  She told me that everything happens for a reason, and there would be a reason for this too.

Simple words, but true words.

Not 5 minutes after Jen’s email we got a call from a pediatric cardio uber specialist who specializes in plugging kids’ heart holes.  He was not available Friday, but Monday he was.  Look no further, we had our reason. 

Tears.

I was still pissed though, but much less pissed.  So I went to Fry’s and bought a new monitor.  A little retail therapy really did the trick and  I started to regain my sanity.

Now What?

Now we had a weekend to contend with. What to do….

Denyse and I decided that we should go out Friday and see a movie and have dinner. Get our minds off of things for a few hours and just try to chill.

I channeled my inner 13 year old girl and we settled on seeing “New Moon.”  Two hours of Bella whining about how she could not live without Edward while rubbing Jacobs six pack. Boo hoo.

I proceeded to kick the crap out of my inner 13 year old girl.  I told her she could watch Glee and that’s it – no more Twilight BS.

As annoying as that movie was here is my biggest beef: Vampires do not glimmer in the sun like they just returned from a West Hollywood  glitter party.  They burst into flames and die. Period.

Sorry, slight tangent.

Dinner at BJ’s was awesome, and after dining we returned to home and returned to reality.  What were we going to do with the boys during this “extra” weekend we suddenly had on our hands?  Having my plans altered so suddenly,  I was still not quite connected with the revised situation.

Up, Up and Away

This weekend was more about keeping us occupied then it was the boys.  They were happy and normal.  We were the ones who were a mess.

So what did we decide?  Indoor skydiving of course. Duh.

On Saturday we headed to Universal City Walk.  They have a place called iFly, where there is a giant vertical plexiglass tube with a humongous fan that blows up at you, simulating a sky dive.

After a short mission briefing the boys took flight (Denyse and I were merely spectators.)  We of course snapped pix and took video.

 
Gabe, flying

They absolutely loved it. And for me, seeing them both so happy was simply awesome.  Truly just what I needed.

Sunday was more chill.  Video games and movies at home.

Learning from our past mistakes, we decided to stay at a hotel near UCLA Sunday night. No chocolate anywhere.  It was just us and Gabe, and he was ecstatic.  A special night at a special hotel, just for him.

Monday, the New Friday

From beginning to end yesterday day was great.

Gabe woke up happy and excited.  It was pouring outside, but the sun was shining around Gabe. In the dark we got in the car and headed from our hotel to UCLA.

Gabe and his favorite blanket

We checked in at 7am and Gabe was told to change into one of those hideous child sized hospital gowns.  He hated it, but in a few minutes he wouldn’t care.

First the anesthesiologist came in and explained his part of the procedure.  He also gave Gabe some happy juice.

  
Happy Juice

Within moments Gabe was high as a kite.  He was babbling and laughing, and in one hilarious instant turned and pointed to me shouting, “ALIEN!”.  I damn near pissed my pants.

Apparently I had two heads and four eyes.  We explained to him what was happening to which he replied “Double vision is AWESOME!”

 
“Daddy is an Alien!”

Not long after that our cardiologist who who be performing the ablation came in to give us the run down.  Gabe was still putting on quite a show.  A few minutes later they wheeled him off with us in tow, to the “Cath Lab” where the procedure was to take place.

Gabe drove his gurney like a X Wing fighter, blasting all Stormtroopers in sight.

  
Stormtroopers Beware

I doubt he will remember any of it, but of course I have pictures.

They covered him in stickers which I assume had various medical applications (pun) but Gabe was thrilled and told me to take a picture of his back.

 
Gabe, the human sticker book

The Gabe Show continued as they transferred him to the procedure table.  He was absolutely hilarious and enjoying every second.  They gave him some gas, and he laughed himself off to sleep.

We then kissed our son Gabriel Thomas Carter goodbye.

 
Gabe, in there somewhere…

These were the first and only sad tears of the day.  The sadness only coming from the uncertainty.

I was glad this transition was so relatively easy, for both him and us.  He was so happy (being hopped up on drugs can do that) that it made it easy for us too.  He was full of love and gave us repeated hugs.  There was no sadness at all until that very last moment.

More Waiting Anyone?

“Maddie’s Room” is the name of the surgical waiting room.  Like everything else at UCLA’s Ronald Regan Hospital it was gorgeous and awesome – decked out just like a Starbucks lounge. It made the waiting LESS painful.  They also give you pagers like at a restaurant so if you are needed for any reason you get paged.

Gabe went in at 9am on the dot.  One of the awesome nurses said she would call us at 11am to give us an update.  And I kid you not at 11am on the dot we got a call.  All was well and Gabe’s procedure was going flawlessly. The first positively good news of the day.  News that would become trend.

Right after that call the Heart-Hole specialist came walking to Maddie’s Room to tell us about what he was going to do when the other doc finished up the ablation.  He was calm and confident, feelings that he easily transferred to us.

We were told that the procedure could take as long as 6 hours.  At the 2.5 hour mark we saw the surgeon walking towards us.

I quickly asked “Are you sure you are done?”

He assured me he was, that he fried the extra connection (the ablation) and that it could not have gone better. No problems at all.

He said he would be checking back, but Heart-Hole doc was up next.

He came walking up to us about 45 minutes later…

When is a Hole Not a Hole?

Gabe is quite a kid.  “Normal” is not a term I would use with him.  He just does things… differently. The hole in his heart is no exception.

I asked Heart-Hole doc the same question I had asked the previous doc, “Are you sure you are done?”

He too assured me he was, and further informed me there was no hole.

He said while there was a minor space, it did not warrant a device (plug) and that the previous heart echo was misleading. So while it appeared to be there a few weeks ago, it was not there now.  And yes, he was sure.

Every time we saw a doc there was more good and truly heart warming news. Because there was no hole, there would be no synthetic material in Gabe’s heart, and no need for the six months of aspirin we were prepared to administer.

I mean, Holy sh^t.

Wakey Wakey

Gabe was going to be awake soon, and we needed to be there.  It wasn’t long before we were escorted up to his room.  He was just coming out as we walked up.  Aside from be VERY thirsty, he was fine and relatively happy.  I even got a slight and groggy smile from him.

 
Happy, Groggy Gabe

Now guess what we got to do? Yup, wait.

They needed to keep an eye on him for a few hours to make sure it was “all good”, then we could go home.

The most exciting thing to happen during our 3 hour wait was Gabe peed in a plastic jar (sorry, no pic).  Other than that we were all pretty bored.

At about 4:30pm Gabe had to prove he could walk.  Which he happily did. The two large bandages on each hip/groin area (catheter insertion sites) made it awkward, but it he was glad to be on his feet again.

 
“Which way is out?”

But what he really wanted was a ride in a wheelchair.  More waiting….

 
Tail end of a long (but good) day

He got his wish as we were eventually escorted to our car. 

 

He cautiously got into his seat and fell asleep for the 45 minute ride home.  I sat beside him, content and relieved – truly happy for the first time in weeks.

Back to Normal

As I write this, Gabe is patiently waiting for me to finish so I can go play Xbox with him, which will be how he *should* spend his next few days.  I say should because I can’t see him sitting still for that long.  He has been put on “restricted activity”  whatever that means when you are 7 and possess unlimited energy.

A full recovery is expected.  We were even told that if this extra connection ever comes back, the doc would hesitate to bother to fix it again. While normal heart check-ups are in his future, he can expect a long, full and heart issue free life.

The Power of Positive Thinking

The original blog post was seen by literally thousands of people around the world.  We were flooded with comments on the blog as well as emails and phone calls from friends, family and strangers alike.  We had yogis, monks, shamans, rabbis, priests and pastors (and every other kind of spiritual dudes you can think of)  all pulling for us and praying for us.

At the very least *all* this did was make us feel better (not an insignificant effect).  At the very best it helped to heal Gabe’s heart (there was a hole, now….). Whatever – it rocked.

I’m not sure how to quantify all the love, support and prayers we received, but this experience would not have been the same without it.

My family and I, Gabe included, cannot thank you all enough.

Due in no small part to all of you, beginning to end, yesterday was a great day.

 

Joshua Gabriel Carter
Gabe’s Grateful Father